If you like your dumb assed hunting trips, …you can keep your dumb assed hunting trips …PERIOD!
Well here I go again.
Now that I am over the embarrassment of last weeks hunt, I’m ready to try it again. My aches and pains have settled down, my index fingers are still sore but it looks like I can get it together one more time.
I have been wearing my insulated duck pants as the weather cools down, and as I make numerous trips around the house and garage. They fit loosely so I have been wearing some wide camo suspenders to keep from pulling my belt so tight it is uncomfortable. My physique defy all physics and comfort.
So what am I up to?,…..It looked good for a hunt yesterday.
I asked to be awakened early enough so that I could get a 6:30 leave time. That would be perfect for the short run I was making.
When the time came, my wife puts one foot in my back and pushes,..Oh my goodness it was early. I crawled out of the bedroom and into my office, where I had laid out all my hunting clothes the night before. It is easier that way, as I have felt the ridicule and scorn of a woman wanting those few extra ZZZZ’s before. It was a perfect time. I try hard to leave early enough to be in position as the sun is coming up.
Every thing is ready, and I am quietly moving around the house, gathering ammo, picking up my pack and caller, The rifle was left in the garage overnight to cool down so my scope would not fog in the cold morning air., I carried the rifle, pack and caller bag out to the car. Uh,…I don’t have my keys on me. DANG IT ! I’ll have to tromp through the house one more time to find my conglomeration of keys. Keys to the truck and smart fob, bulky smart key to the suv, keys and smart fob clicker to the car, mail box key etc….a very bulky set of keys.
They aren’t on my desk, they aren’t anywhere. Not in the kitchen. Sometimes my daughters keys are mistaken for mine but hers are out in plain sight, as mine should be. I may have left them in the cars trunk as I took it to the range. It would be a farfetched accident that I would have dropped them in there, but it was the last thing I remember doing with them. I had opened the trunk and put my targets up, from a return from the range, getting my rifle tuned up from the last time I dropped it. Remember??
It was getting lighter now and my frustration was building, I’m not going back into the bedroom to see if they were on the dresser!!! That is out of the question!!……No coyote is worth that!! So I walked around the house and garage several mores more times, just as frustration is turning to a burning anger. I crept back to the bedroom and ever so lightly put my hand on the door knob, I pulled it against the door frame tightly for the latch would not make any noise and I gave it a small push,..just enough to get my head around the corner of the door and peek at my dresser. No keys. Dang it!! I pulled the door closed and one of my belts hanging behind the door bangs the door. Uh oh,..
Again I am pouring through all my clothes pockets, picking up every thing on the floor, it is getting late now.. I guess I’ll just have to cancel this hunt today. I sat down in my office chair,…lamenting,. all of the crap I do to get ready for a hunt. Drive 1 hour sight my rifle in and put every thing away. Charge my batteries for the electronic caller,… have every thing ready to load up,… get up at dark thirty,..and I can’t find my [beeep] keys.
About that time my grandson was getting ready to go out the door for school,…I had a feeling, not a thought per’se but a wild assed feeling.
Something similar happened at a cowboy shoot in California years ago. I used an out house and I got up and put my clothes together, and went on my merry way. 10 minutes later my keys were gone. Oh boy! We looked and looked, several other shooters were looking and I announced over the PA system that I had lost my keys and please watch for them. My keys were gone!
That afternoon, A lady standing behind me in the shooters line, asked my if I was looking for keys. When I was using the out house, they had slipped down my suspenders and as I got up they had slipped over my shoulders and down my back. Moral,..if someone is looking at your [beeep] it may to help you out.
DERREL!! I said. Look at grandpa’s back and see if you see any keys…..Then I heard the familiar jingle,, as he pulled the carbineer up and over my shoulder. AGGHHHHH!!!! Thank you Derrel.
It is bright light as I pull up on this county road at my hunting spot. It is only ½ mile over a little hill. I have pulled many coyotes out of this area and I have had a hard time waiting to go there again. The area across the road is a gentleman’s ranch area with all of the houses with 35 acres, surrounding a big lake. The last time I was at this location a lady stopped as I was gathering my stuff, and reminded me that there was no hunting in this area. I thought “Lady, you have no right stopping me in the middle of a county road and telling me anything“!!. But being Mr. nice guy, I took her little lesson to heart and told her that I indeed had permission to hunt the area I was going to, and I laid out the distances of the property, and that she shouldn’t worry,………… I would not trespass on their little ranches. AGHHHH! I was so pissed I forgot my cross sticks,…but that’s another story…………
It was very quiet when I was gathering my stuff up. Lots of stuff you know ear protection, head cover, extra batteries, rifle and of course, shooting sticks. I wasn’t going to forget them. I upped my small pack, but I still have trouble with my shoulders, and I have to hunchback a minute to get the pack straps into position, and lock the chests strap. Then it happened……….!
You know when you hunt these wily coyotes, you want stealth to be part of the game. You want to charge the rifle quietly, close the car door softly, watch the wind, don’t press down on fence wires too hard as they sing along the fence..
I was doing the hunchback and adjusting my pack, and the car alarm decided it would tell me that not only my gonads were getting pressure but the warning on my keys were getting pressed. BEEP< BEEP< BEEP
Well here I go again.
Now that I am over the embarrassment of last weeks hunt, I’m ready to try it again. My aches and pains have settled down, my index fingers are still sore but it looks like I can get it together one more time.
I have been wearing my insulated duck pants as the weather cools down, and as I make numerous trips around the house and garage. They fit loosely so I have been wearing some wide camo suspenders to keep from pulling my belt so tight it is uncomfortable. My physique defy all physics and comfort.
So what am I up to?,…..It looked good for a hunt yesterday.
I asked to be awakened early enough so that I could get a 6:30 leave time. That would be perfect for the short run I was making.
When the time came, my wife puts one foot in my back and pushes,..Oh my goodness it was early. I crawled out of the bedroom and into my office, where I had laid out all my hunting clothes the night before. It is easier that way, as I have felt the ridicule and scorn of a woman wanting those few extra ZZZZ’s before. It was a perfect time. I try hard to leave early enough to be in position as the sun is coming up.
Every thing is ready, and I am quietly moving around the house, gathering ammo, picking up my pack and caller, The rifle was left in the garage overnight to cool down so my scope would not fog in the cold morning air., I carried the rifle, pack and caller bag out to the car. Uh,…I don’t have my keys on me. DANG IT ! I’ll have to tromp through the house one more time to find my conglomeration of keys. Keys to the truck and smart fob, bulky smart key to the suv, keys and smart fob clicker to the car, mail box key etc….a very bulky set of keys.
They aren’t on my desk, they aren’t anywhere. Not in the kitchen. Sometimes my daughters keys are mistaken for mine but hers are out in plain sight, as mine should be. I may have left them in the cars trunk as I took it to the range. It would be a farfetched accident that I would have dropped them in there, but it was the last thing I remember doing with them. I had opened the trunk and put my targets up, from a return from the range, getting my rifle tuned up from the last time I dropped it. Remember??
It was getting lighter now and my frustration was building, I’m not going back into the bedroom to see if they were on the dresser!!! That is out of the question!!……No coyote is worth that!! So I walked around the house and garage several mores more times, just as frustration is turning to a burning anger. I crept back to the bedroom and ever so lightly put my hand on the door knob, I pulled it against the door frame tightly for the latch would not make any noise and I gave it a small push,..just enough to get my head around the corner of the door and peek at my dresser. No keys. Dang it!! I pulled the door closed and one of my belts hanging behind the door bangs the door. Uh oh,..
Again I am pouring through all my clothes pockets, picking up every thing on the floor, it is getting late now.. I guess I’ll just have to cancel this hunt today. I sat down in my office chair,…lamenting,. all of the crap I do to get ready for a hunt. Drive 1 hour sight my rifle in and put every thing away. Charge my batteries for the electronic caller,… have every thing ready to load up,… get up at dark thirty,..and I can’t find my [beeep] keys.
About that time my grandson was getting ready to go out the door for school,…I had a feeling, not a thought per’se but a wild assed feeling.
Something similar happened at a cowboy shoot in California years ago. I used an out house and I got up and put my clothes together, and went on my merry way. 10 minutes later my keys were gone. Oh boy! We looked and looked, several other shooters were looking and I announced over the PA system that I had lost my keys and please watch for them. My keys were gone!
That afternoon, A lady standing behind me in the shooters line, asked my if I was looking for keys. When I was using the out house, they had slipped down my suspenders and as I got up they had slipped over my shoulders and down my back. Moral,..if someone is looking at your [beeep] it may to help you out.
DERREL!! I said. Look at grandpa’s back and see if you see any keys…..Then I heard the familiar jingle,, as he pulled the carbineer up and over my shoulder. AGGHHHHH!!!! Thank you Derrel.
It is bright light as I pull up on this county road at my hunting spot. It is only ½ mile over a little hill. I have pulled many coyotes out of this area and I have had a hard time waiting to go there again. The area across the road is a gentleman’s ranch area with all of the houses with 35 acres, surrounding a big lake. The last time I was at this location a lady stopped as I was gathering my stuff, and reminded me that there was no hunting in this area. I thought “Lady, you have no right stopping me in the middle of a county road and telling me anything“!!. But being Mr. nice guy, I took her little lesson to heart and told her that I indeed had permission to hunt the area I was going to, and I laid out the distances of the property, and that she shouldn’t worry,………… I would not trespass on their little ranches. AGHHHH! I was so pissed I forgot my cross sticks,…but that’s another story…………
It was very quiet when I was gathering my stuff up. Lots of stuff you know ear protection, head cover, extra batteries, rifle and of course, shooting sticks. I wasn’t going to forget them. I upped my small pack, but I still have trouble with my shoulders, and I have to hunchback a minute to get the pack straps into position, and lock the chests strap. Then it happened……….!
You know when you hunt these wily coyotes, you want stealth to be part of the game. You want to charge the rifle quietly, close the car door softly, watch the wind, don’t press down on fence wires too hard as they sing along the fence..
I was doing the hunchback and adjusting my pack, and the car alarm decided it would tell me that not only my gonads were getting pressure but the warning on my keys were getting pressed. BEEP< BEEP< BEEP
