Doctors Say the Darndest Things

centerfire

New member
Take a gander at these comments culled form doctors clipboards:

1. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
2. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
3. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.
4. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.
5. Discharge status: Alive but without my permission.
6. The patient refused autopsy.
7. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
8. Patient has left white bloodcells at another hospital.
9. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40-pound weight gain in the past three days.
10. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
11. She ins numb from her toes down.
12. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
13. The skin was moist and dry.
14. Occasional, constant, infrequent headaches.
15. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
16. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
17. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.
18. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
19. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
20. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
21. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
22. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Blank, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.
23. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.
24. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities
 
Hey Centerfire--thanks, I'm going to share that one with a couple of gals that teach medical transcription courses here at my college. Great stuff!!!
 
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